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Mercia Royale
Lady Neonvale Duffle bag
Lady Neonvale Duffle bag
Regular price
£66.50 GBP
Regular price
Sale price
£66.50 GBP
Unit price
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per
Taxes included.
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The “Bloom Hauler” Duffle – Lady Neonvale Edition
For flights, gym trips, or vanishing acts. This duffle bag doesn’t ask questions — it just carries everything you refuse to deal with. Spacious, structured, and quietly menacing, it holds your gear, your grudges, and your essentials with equal disdain.
Multiple interior pockets for organising your beautiful chaos. Zipped compartment for the valuables you pretend not to care about. Comes with a padded shoulder strap for heavier emotional loads.
• 100% polyester with black interlining – synthetic durability with inner darkness
• Fabric weight: 305 g/m² – not light, not heavy, just inevitable
• Size: 22″ × 11.5″ × 11.5″ – vast, like your avoidance
• T-piping – built to hold shape even when you don’t
• Adjustable & removable padded shoulder strap – carry it your way
• Dual padded handles with hook & loop – grip it and go
• Mesh side pocket – breathable compartmentalisation
• Multiple interior pockets – organised chaos
• Components sourced from China – like everything else you’re running from
Pack it. Leave. Don’t explain. You’re in Neonvale now.
This product doesn’t exist until you ask for it. Like hope. Or functional government. We summon it from the abyss the moment you place your order, which means it takes a little longer to arrive — patience is a virtue, or at least a mildly effective coping mechanism.
We don’t do bulk. We don’t do waste. We do exactly what’s needed, when it’s needed. Because the planet’s dying and we’d rather not speed things up just to shave off 48 hours.
Thanks for choosing not to contribute to the landfill cult. Your restraint is noted by the gods of late capitalism.
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, and lead, cadmium, bisphenols and phthalate level requirements.
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Mercia Royale and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at . or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.
For flights, gym trips, or vanishing acts. This duffle bag doesn’t ask questions — it just carries everything you refuse to deal with. Spacious, structured, and quietly menacing, it holds your gear, your grudges, and your essentials with equal disdain.
Multiple interior pockets for organising your beautiful chaos. Zipped compartment for the valuables you pretend not to care about. Comes with a padded shoulder strap for heavier emotional loads.
• 100% polyester with black interlining – synthetic durability with inner darkness
• Fabric weight: 305 g/m² – not light, not heavy, just inevitable
• Size: 22″ × 11.5″ × 11.5″ – vast, like your avoidance
• T-piping – built to hold shape even when you don’t
• Adjustable & removable padded shoulder strap – carry it your way
• Dual padded handles with hook & loop – grip it and go
• Mesh side pocket – breathable compartmentalisation
• Multiple interior pockets – organised chaos
• Components sourced from China – like everything else you’re running from
Pack it. Leave. Don’t explain. You’re in Neonvale now.
This product doesn’t exist until you ask for it. Like hope. Or functional government. We summon it from the abyss the moment you place your order, which means it takes a little longer to arrive — patience is a virtue, or at least a mildly effective coping mechanism.
We don’t do bulk. We don’t do waste. We do exactly what’s needed, when it’s needed. Because the planet’s dying and we’d rather not speed things up just to shave off 48 hours.
Thanks for choosing not to contribute to the landfill cult. Your restraint is noted by the gods of late capitalism.
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, and lead, cadmium, bisphenols and phthalate level requirements.
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Mercia Royale and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at . or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.
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