Emo Water Travel mug with a handle

Commute with the emotional stability of a travel mug that’s hotter than your unresolved anger and colder than your unread texts. Available in 25 oz — for when you’re hydrated, or just filled with caffeine and spite. Sleek. Durable. Emotionally unavailable. Fits in most cup holders and absolutely none of your life plans.

• Stainless steel, like your walls
• Lead and BPA-free — unlike your ex
• Hand-wash only, because this isn't a shortcut
• Sourced from China, but emotionally from nowhere

Caution: Always open the lid before adding hot drinks. You don’t need more pressure in your life.

This product doesn’t exist until you ask for it. Like hope. Or functional government. We summon it from the abyss the moment you place your order, which means it takes a little longer to arrive — patience is a virtue, or at least a mildly effective coping mechanism.

We don’t do bulk. We don’t do waste. We do exactly what’s needed, when it’s needed. Because the planet’s dying and we’d rather not speed things up just to shave off 48 hours.

Thanks for choosing not to contribute to the landfill cult. Your restraint is noted by the gods of late capitalism.

Size guide